She still wanted to get away.
Paul was not in the pool when she went out into the garden, nor was he in the morning room when she went in to breakfast.
'Is Mr Paul in his study?' she inquired of Stella.
The girl shook her head. 'He had breakfast, well, just a cup of coffee and one piece of toast, it was, and went out in his car. He said to tell you, Madam Paul, that he would be back for dinner.' The girl's English was not at all good but to Lynn who had become used to it, it was understandable.
Disappointment flooded over Lynn, and it was no use pretending that she did not know the reason. This was the moment of truth. No, that had occurred last night but she had denied it admittance. Now, though, she could no longer thrust it away. She loved her husband, and as he loved her there was nothing in the way of their future happiness.
But she would be enslaved. Naturally the thought returned and she bit her lip. To be mastered all one's life. To be forced to obey one's husband in every little thing. It was like drifting way back into the past, into a Victorian age or even earlier.
Well, it was that or separation. She shook her head. No, never separation. Her heart and her life belonged to Paul; he could treat them how he liked but she would never leave him.
To her consternation he did not return for dinner; she was perplexed and her whole inside was churning with an unknown fear. Had he had an accident? But surely she would have known before now? It was a quarter past eight when the phone rang and she ran to the hall to answer it.
'It's Paul.'
'Oh! Where have you been?'
'Out.' His voice was taut and rather strained, she thought. 'Don't wait up for me, Lynn. I shall be very late.'
She put a hand to her throat, sure he was with Thoula. Yes, he had lost patience with her and gone where he knew he was wanted.
But I didn't repulse him at the end, she thought quivering, tears starting to her eyes. Surely he knew—She stopped. He knew nothing except that he possessed a power over her physically. He still believed she did not love him; he had accepted the fact that he had not managed to do what he had wanted to do in the time available and so he had accepted defeat. She recalled noticing despair in his manner and had thought there was something else as well. There had been something else—defeat.
'Where are you?' she quivered.
'It isn't important.' A small pregnant silence and then, 'Lynn?'
'Yes?'
'You are free to pack your bags and go. You'll not lose your fortune as I shall tell Jake that I want a divorce—'
'But, Paul—'
'No self-recriminations, little one,' he broke in gently. 'As I admitted, I was to blame as well as you, perhaps more so because I put the idea of marrying me into your head. But as you were saying last evening when I came home, a marriage based on desire alone can't last.'
'Our marriage,' she said desperately, 'isn't based—'
'I know, it isn't based on love and so it ought to be dissolved.' Another pause and then, slowly and quietly, 'Neither of us loved the other—'
'Paul!'
'Yes, I'm still here. Lynn, don't have any regrets over this. We've both been pretty rotten with one another but let's forget it.' Again he paused but now Lynn had nothing to say. She was accepting that she had killed his love and he was being generous, the perfect English gentleman she had known all those years ago in England. He was gallantly letting her go, and also making sure that the blame for the broken marriage was his alone, so that Lynn would get what was her right.
Her freedom and her fortune being handed to her on a plate. The gift was bitter aloes in her mouth. She said dully, 'I'll ring off now, Paul. Have a pleasant evening.' With Thoula, she added, but silently as she replaced the receiver on its hook.
The next half hour was pure agony. Had she lost his love? she was asking herself one moment, while the next she was telling herself that it would have been a miracle if she had kept it, the way she had treated him. Tears of self-pity welled up in her eyes as she paced the bedroom floor like a caged lion, having told Pavlos that she was unwell and would not be dining. No, she did not need anything in her room, no, not a drink either. She did not want to be disturbed at all.
Should she pack now? Was Paul in Athens and intending to stay there until he could be sure she was gone? Or was he with his pillow friend, staying with her, apologising for his hasty marriage and saying that it was to be dissolved?
Lynn sat down on the bed and instantly rose again. She might as well pack and leave at once. She could phone for a taxi to take her to Athens, and tomorrow she could fly home. Home… Tears began to fall, running down her cheeks and onto her dress, the pretty white flowered evening dress that was Paul's favourite. Angrily she took it off, putting on a pair of slacks and a long-sleeved blouse. She took out a pair of sandals from the cupboard and slipped her feet into them. Her packing was done in ten minutes, everything being thrown haphazardly into her suitcases after she had phoned for the taxi. She managed to get her cases out without being seen by any of the servants, using the French door from the bedroom onto the verandah. She was waiting at the gate when the taxi appeared, and was in it and away before anyone could possibly know she was gone.
The way was past the archaeological site and on sudden impulse Lynn told the driver to stop. She had been promised by Paul that she would see it at dawn and at dusk and in the light of a full moon. Well, she had missed the dusk and dawn miracles, but she would see it by moonlight. Sad as she was, she felt she must see, just once, the wonderful sight described to her so vividly by her husband.
'Wait for me,' she said to the driver. 'I shall be about half an hour.'
'You're going onto the site?'
'Yes.'
'Alone?'
'Is there any reason why I shouldn't go alone?'
'It's lonely, and mysterious—' He stopped, trying to find another adjective and then shook his head. 'I don't speak very good English,' he said with a grimace.
'You speak excellent English,' she was swift to contradict. 'I shan't be long. You won't go away?' she added doubtfully.
'No, certainly not. But it'll be very late when we get to Athens, the early hours of the morning, in fact.'
'That's all right. I shouldn't have much difficulty in getting a hotel room.'
She left him, walking briskly from the road to the fence surrounding the ancient site. She bent and squeezed underneath, because of course the turnstile entrance would be locked. Paul had told her that the local inhabitants invariably gained entrance at night by getting under the fence.
She looked up to the enormous moon looking like the sun, faded and cold. But its argent glow bathed everything—the Temple of Apollo, the Treasuries, the massive amphitheatre. But most impressive were the mountains encircling the sacred precincts, the glorious Shining Ones of ancient times, still as awesome, still hiding secrets and still the haunt of giant eagles whose aeries were somewhere up there, inaccessible to man.
Lynn walked on, past the rows of shops, or the ruins of the shops, and on, but then she wandered away from that path onto another and she was staring at the sacred spring where the Pythia, or Priestess, would be cleansed in preparation for the task she was to perform, that of spokeswoman for the Delphic Oracle, her incoherent mutterings being passed on to the waiting priests. From every corner of the world came the suppliants, asking for advice and paying stupendous prices for it. The Treasuries had once been filled to overflowing with gold objects; there were many thousand of gold statues lining every path. When the site was raided by the Turks over two thousand of these precious statues were stolen and they were hardly missed.
'It must have been wonderful,' breathed Lynn, for the moment forgetful of her troubles in the incredible beauty of her surroundings. The towering mountains glowed silver, with mysterious shadows made by the gullies. The high columns of the Temple of Apollo, god of light, were awesome in their magnitude and mystery and for a long while Lynn's eyes were focussed upwards. And it was not until her glance swept downwards that she saw the dark silhouette of a man, still as a statue, his body erect. Her heart gave a great lurch and she turned swiftly, starting to run.
And then something made her stop, a skin-prickling sensation, but not of danger.
Slowly she swung around again, and knew it was her husband standing there, in the moonlight, a solitary figure in all this vast enclosure—a lonely figure, and sad. Tears filled her eyes and for a few moments she was unable to see. But she found a handkerchief and soon she was approaching the place where Paul stood, the place inside the great temple which was supposed in ancient times to be the centre of the earth, the place where the omphalos had stood, placed there when Zeus, king of all the gods of Olympus, had sent out two eagles from opposite sides of the earth, and they had met at that sacred spot.
As she came to about six feet from him she stopped, wondering if he would feel her presence. She took another step and he turned swiftly, on the alert.
'Lynn!' He stared as if he could not believe the evidence of his eyes. 'No—'
'Paul, I w—want to talk to—to you.' She felt shy, and inadequate, because he seemed so noble standing there, his figure tall and slender in the moonlight, so superior that he might have been a god himself—but not the sun god! For he seemed dark and forbidding, more like Hades, whose home had been in the Underworld. 'It's important,' she persevered when he did not speak. 'I have something to—to tell you.' She took another step, then halted.
'How do you come to be here?' he demanded, his voice harsh in the silence around them, the deep, mysterious silence of antiquity.
'I was in a taxi,' she began, 'and I suddenly wanted to see this place. He's waiting for me—the driver—'
'Then don't keep him waiting any longer. If you're going to Athens, it's going to be tomorrow when you get there.'
She swallowed, trying to dislodge the lump in her throat. 'I d—don't want to go,' she confessed. 'Not—not if you want me to stay, Paul.'
He stared at her, and she could see a muscle working furiously in his throat.
'Do you know what you're saying?' Again his voice was harsh. 'You don't love me so you can go! As you've said more than once, desire's not enough!'
'It's very true, it isn't enough—'
'Then go. You should not be here when you've to make that long journey to Athens!'
Lynn hesitated; she was sure he still loved her, was sure he had been driving about all day, and that he had come here to be totally alone until she had gone out of his life forever.
'You can't force me to go,' she said, in a voice that was high-pitched because of her heightened emotions. 'I'm your wife. You married me and—and so you have to abide by it!'
'Abide—?' It was Paul who moved now; he came close, to tower over her.
Before he could say anything else she was confessing shyly, 'I love you, Paul—I knew last night but was idiotic enough not to tell you. I was going to tell you this morning but you weren't there—' She broke off, starting to cry. 'I don't deserve it, but I know you love me, your mother told Maria but Maria didn't hear her so she couldn't tell me but—but I guessed, and so long as I love you—'
'Lynn, darling, stop—' He took her in his arms, stroking her hair, touching her cheeks and wiping away the tears with his fingers. And he kissed her, on her lips and her cheek and her temple. 'Dear little one, you were talking at random. How could mother have told Maria I loved you and Maria not hear her? And how did you guess?' His voice was edged with amusement as he added, 'You can tell me another time—'
'No, I'll tell you now,' she broke in, a little sob escaping her. 'I can easily explain it all.' And she did, but received a little shake for her trouble.
'You knew I loved you, and you realised that you loved me, and yet you kept quiet? Little one, you'll try my patience once too often! Can you realise just what I have suffered today? It's been a thousand years of agony.'
'You love me so very much?' There was great wonderment in her voice, and gratitude, and love, all mingling together but it escaped her husband as he swept her into an embrace that left her feeling that every bone in her body must be broken.
'That is just a small sample to show you how much I love you! I adore you, Lynn, I worship you, and I think I have from the first meeting.'
'Don't,' she pleaded, putting up a timid hand to cover his lips. 'Don't remind me of my foolishness. I ought to have run off with you. Father would have come round, just as you said he would.'
'Never mind. We've found each other now.' He drew her close in a gentle, tender embrace, and as he held her she felt a shudder pass through him, as if he were recollecting the agony he had been through all day. Lovingly she went on tiptoe to kiss his lips.
'I love you,' she said simply. 'I only discovered it last night but it must have been there before that. I had an obsession about freedom; I didn't want to be bossed about by my husband.'
'Nor will you be, darling,' he murmured close to her cheek.
A ripple of laughter fell on the silent air.
'I know you better than you know yourself, Paul. At the first sign of disobedience you'll threaten me with a beating.'
'Never! When have I threatened to use violence on you?'
'Several times,' she replied, 'and you meant it.'
'But things are very different now,' he pointed out. 'I was trying desperately to make you fall in love with me—'
'And because I didn't do it immediately you lost your temper.'
'Dearest,' he said with an amused little laugh, 'shall we change the subject? I don't know about you, but I have such a lot to say to you, sweetheart. But first of all, I believe it was fate that made you stop here to see the site of the Oracle.'
'I agree. How long have you been here, Paul?' she asked, snuggling more closely into his shoulder and bringing her face up to meet his chin.
'Since before dusk. I went to phone you after making my decision, then came back.'
'If only I'd spoken last night!' she cried, distressed.
'Forget it, beloved. It's in the past.' His mouth caressed her lips, and his hand was tender on her cheek. 'I'm glad you saw the sanctuary like this,' he was saying after a long silence from which his wife emerged breathless. 'It's something we shall always remember every time we come here, that this is where we found each other.'
'The centre of the world. Tell me about Apollo, Paul.'
'He was the god of light. His mother was chased by a python sent by Hera, jealous wife of Zeus who had slept with her. Well, Apollo was a twin whose sister was Artemis, patron of animals in Greek mythology. Apollo was born adult and came at once to Delphi to slay the python who persecuted his mother. When he had slain it, the deed represented the triumph of good over evil, light over darkness. This is typically pagan, you find it today in places like Bali, where the religion hinges all the time on the battle between good and evil. Apollo made Delphi his sanctuary; he took the place over from Mother Earth.'
'Mother Earth? Isn't it all so complicated, Paul? What is real and what is mythology?'
'It's very hard to tell where one ends and the other begins. There are a number of books at home so if you're interested, you can find plenty to occupy your time.'
'I shall love that.' She sighed and laid her head on his shoulder. 'I could stay here all night,' she confessed. 'Shall we climb all those steps and go to the top of the amphitheatre?'
'Some other time, sweet. I don't know about you, but I could do with something to eat.'
She glanced up swiftly.
'You haven't eaten all day,' she accused.
'Did you have your dinner?'
'I couldn't eat.'
'In that case,' he decided, 'we shall have an intimate, candlelit dinner, a stroll in the garden afterwards, and then….' He trailed off, his smile tender. 'We shall be together a little differently this time, darling, because you love me.'
'Because I love you,' she responded fervently, and after he had kissed her, he tucked her arm into his and together they walked from the Temple, along the Sacred Way, and out to the road where the taxi was waiting and, farther along, in the shadows, Paul's car. The luggage was transferred, the taxi driver given his full fare to Athens and then, getting into the car, Paul drove his wife home.
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